I was alone. I was in a place where even if I could understand anyone, I couldn’t understand myself, and neither could anyone else. I was angry at t...mes, happy at others. I could hate in an instant what I spent a lifetime loving, and I never knew why. I was an unsolvable riddle, and living as such was terrifying. I was lost. When I saw you, I saw a kindness, a curiosity, a cracked idealism somewhere within your eyes. You walked with grace and poetry in every step, you smiled such a small smile. Three weeks later saw us winging our way to JFK, I had been forced to limit Andrews visits to my room to once a week, he was wearing me out once he had mastered the art of holding off till I came, he had even taken me in the shower one day holding my leg and shafting me and of course the freedom also meant that I was seeing much more of Gerald, he came round to my house one evening for a meal and I introduced him to Andrew, I managed to get him into my bed and almost but not quite fucked his. More

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