”“You snuck into the ladies’ baths,” Octavia said brightly.“No,” Joseph said, shaking his head. His voice was heavy. “We learned by find...ng women alongside roads. They had been raped and discarded. We learned by storming into camps where men were forcing women to do terrible things. We learned through witnessing violence. We both are wise enough to know the proper way to treat women we care about. We knew enough to know that what we’d seen and heard had little to do with affection. We could not. Neither of us married. I don't know what reason Beth had for staying single, but my reason was shyness around girls and a rather plain appearance. Also, in my mind the ideal girl was one just like Beth, and I could never find a girl that measured up to her standards. We may have no longer been close to each other, but Beth was still very much in my mind. In my pleasure fantasies, it was still Beth I pictured. She was my standard for female perfection and was the subject of all my masturbatory. More

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