The way I was exploited in the name of "diksha", in the name of "treatment", and in the name of "jagya" makes me feel so ashamed even today, after so ...any years. I was exploited so very cleverly and emphatically at every level and my desire to get a child was so high that I allowed everything crossing every limit of decency and modesty. It was one week stay in the ashram of Guru-ji at Rampur and within that period I had to allow at least half a dozen males to enjoy my 28-year-old fully matured. When its new for us our body may react in a different manner.Because we are complicated than men when it comes to hormones.Learn to think about pleasure when u are with him.Surrender yourself to him upto a level.The next time when you fuck,when it’s starts paining,ignore it and concentrate on the pleasure part.Slowly you’ll see that the pain disappears and there’s nothing but pleasure. Don’t forget to ask each other about your sexual preferences.Do as he likes and if he loves you, he’ll also do. More

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