‘Erm, Ella, are you still on the pill?’ I asked.‘Shit, no, hadn’t thought of that, best we go get me the morning after pill and back on the pi...l.’ ‘We can use condoms if you want instead of the pill.’ I offered.‘Hell no,’ She replied. ‘I hate condoms, I like to be able to feel you, you’re just going to have to give me my pill each day.’ After that I got up, carried Ella to the bathroom and sat her on the toilet so she could do her business then I sat her in the shower and put it on so I could. She had to have known it was me who carried her; I was the only one of the three of us strong enough. And to be honest, it had been almost ... nice. It was the first time I’d been close to her, touched her, since her Joining. She smelled just like I remembered: mint, from that stuff she used on her teeth, and lavender from her shampoo. I’d wanted to kiss her, to take away her pain, to make her see ... but Aedan would have killed me, and I was quite certain the gesture wouldn’t have been welcome. More

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