That’s the only word I can use to describe it. It was ... a very terrible time for us both. He was hiding his sexuality; I was a complete idiot. We ...ere ashamed to even look at each other for the next month. I mean, we had a song together. I didn’t have a band yet so I used a part of his. My last song led directly into his first. It was this duet and it was supposed to be all romantic and ... sexy. Instead it was awkward and embarrassing. We dropped it midway through the tour.“He told me at the. " Several guys would look at me but keep going. Soon an older guy came by on a bicycle. He was about 40 or 50, I didn't know for sure, alittle heavy, but nice. I said my line and he circled back to me. My heart raced as he asked, "did I hear you right?" I said again, "do you want a blowjob" he said, "I would love one, where do you want to go?" I didn't know actually. I had not thought that far ahead. He suggested we go under a near by pier. It was getting dark and there weren't a lot of people. More

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