Or maybe somewhere else, somewhere much more comfortable. So I approach."Hey man." I start. "You alone tonight?"A quick nod. Okay, that's what I was l...oking for. Let's do this. I take another sip of my drink."Hmm, but you don't want to be alone do you?" I ask.I see your ever-so-slight head shake. That brings a smile to my face. "Listen," I continue, "you seem pretty shy, and I don't want to scare you off or anything, but I feel like if I don't just come out with this it'll be a waste of both. But, truth is, I don’t always mean it. Can an internal misstatement of motive — a lie to myself — be, on some level, aspirational? Understandable?Out there somewhere is someone I would like to be ... intend to be. Yet, I can’t pretend to be outside of my own moral concerns. Can’t ignore the salience of my own behavior. The lawlessness.On the other hand, I can’t live my life like I’m in a ... an austere Presbyterian church. Hard pews and upright angles. I can’t listen only to the sermon with. More

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