I didn't flaunt my transition, but it was obvious that I wasn't a boy anymore. The crowd didn't seem to care and being surrounded by four other big gu...s protected me from any rude drunks who wanted to see the "faggot" or "fairy". That fall, I turned eighteen. I was accepted at two different music schools, but, working in the studio had changed my perspective and I decided to continue to work and take courses in electrical engineering at our state college. I would minor in music studies. At. (You're not the cause,she told herself. Yes, you are the cause, she retorted. I didn't causethis. Yeah, but you didn't stop it. Didn't stop it? I couldn't stop it!Couldn't, or didn't want to?)Her head ached as she began to feel overwhelmed with anguish and guilt.Somewhere, in the guilty part of her ruminations, the image of Sam surfacedaccusingly. Then Gemma's image floated, shaking her head, into her feveredimagination, joined by Vanessa, Helen and Maria. Genevieve, too, appearedin her mind's. More

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