" Hazel said. Why did I compliment her looks after eye-molesting her 5 seconds ago? I'm such an idiot Hazel thought. "Thanks! My agent says it might g...t on TRL next week so, cross your fingers!" This was typical of their interactions and their lives. Where Hazel failed awkwardly, Lily effortlessly succeeded. For instance, although they train equally hard and devote a more or less equal amount of time to soccer, Hazel has become an undatable female jock who is very widely believed to be a secret. "What's fake?" she asked."Probably the whole thing," I said. "Fake story, fake sex, and my guess is those are fake tits," I told her as the actress bounced up and down making ridiculous moaning noises. "Sorry, I didn't know it was like this," she replied. "Plus, don't guys like big boobs?" Well, yeah, kind of," I said. "But not those fake ones. I prefer natural tits, even if they're small." Well no one else seems to like them," she pouted."No offense, Alyssa, but you don't even really have. More

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