”He bit his lip.I frowned. “What?”“Would you...like to go see a movie next Saturday? I got a car for my birthday and...”I blinked in utter s...ock. “You want to...date me?”“I know,” he groaned. “Why would you want to date me? I'm the President of the Math Club.”“No, no,” I said. “I just... Why would you want to date...me? I'm a whore.”“You are,” he said. “And...” His cheeks grew pink.“And you find that hot,” I said, blinking in realization “You like watching me with other guys. Seeing me writhe. .. “Divorce attorney.”Obedient WifeThere was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, “When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.”And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him. Well, he died. He was stretched out. More

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