The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for comm...n words.And the winners are:1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.6. Negligent, adj. Absent mindedly answering. "As soon as Juice comes around, we'll talk about the next step." Next step?" I said. What was the next step after mass insanity? "You knew this was going to happen?" Of course. It's all part of the plan." Plan?" said Hinkman. "I've got my own knockers. I'm a fewkin bird!"Charlie laughed. "We all are," he said. "Don't worry. It's only temporary."I wanted to ask him more, but curiosity got the better of me. Carefully, I eased myself out of the chair and stood. My pants weren't unzipped, but they. More

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