I just never mixed the two thoughts. What I did think about over the past several weeks, even months, is how much I enjoy being with you. About how mu...h happier I am when we are together, when we do things together, I don't mean sex, I mean other things, and how I miss you when you're not around. I realized that I had been married for all those years and never once did I miss my wife when we were not together. I realized also, one day, that I was talking to you in my apartment when you weren't. It’s just that this was a special holiday for my family. For me too I guess,” I wiped my eyes.“And when Christmas comes?” she asked. I felt a flash of anger and pain as my body tensed.“That’s what I thought,” she stated. I sighed.“At some point, I am going to have to embrace this when I am alone,” I cautioned her. My two angles couldn’t be with me everyday. And they had let me know that they could not be with me forever. At some point, I was going to have to deal with the holidays alone.“I. More

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