The dizziness and wooziness turned into a swirl and a twirl and the room began spinning faster and faster around me. Without warning, I started puking...and the circle widened quickly. I was sick and the vomiting would not stop. The crowd thinned a bit and Ben finally came to the rescue. Earlier, while I was making a fool out of myself, he had frantically been trying to get to me but the crowd had prevented him from doing so. Some of the brothers who had invited us knew that he might put a stop. I wanted my fix. I wanted to get rid of the thoughts of him as they burned fresh in my mind. I wanted to get rid of the emotion that nearly overwhelmed me every single time I saw him with her. One night, through a fit of starvation and lust craze, I ran to the cupboards, aimlessly opening and slamming the wooden doors. The last door I opened was the medicine cabinet. I stopped in my tracks. There they were, pills – so many, many pills. I threw all the bottles down onto the floor, hoping to find. More

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