He answers on the third ring.“What do you want man? I’m busy.”“Turn on your TV, Jason.”“Why, is oprah on early?”I sigh. “Jason, your l...fe is in danger. Turn on the TV.”“Whatever, dude.”I hang up. Five minutes later he calls back.I ask “You ok?”“Dude, this is one fucked up prank. This is like, the most messed up hoax of all hoaxes since like, they landed the space shuttle on the moon or whatever.”“It’s not a joke, Jason. This is happening. Caroline is at my door, freaking out and covered in. .There is nothing worse than bad school pizza.Mind you, "good" school pizza is no great shakes either. It's better than many of the other options, but you mostly get it because it LOOKS like pizza even if it doesn't taste like it, and you can fool yourself into believing you're somehow gaming the system by eating such a treat instead of something healthy.Today, it barely even looked like pizza."How the hell do you fuck this up?" Cindy held up the offending rectangle of dough and brownish cheese. More

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