I had two bottles of chardonnay in hand and lots of ideas of how to apply said wine to my advantage. As I approached the car she was in the back recli...ing the rear seats. As I opened the door she wiggled her butt and said, “Just lay down here so we can talk for a minute.” As I obeyed she grabbed a bottle and took a big swig. She looked at me and smiled, “I’m not in a relationship in any way, but I haven’t gotten laid in seven months and I just want to fuck your brains out." How could I. They all share a look. “Well?” asks Teddy.“I lost mine!” Said Tim and Tom at the same time.Teddy then smiles and pulls out 3 quarters.A Newfie went hunting one day in Ontario and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home when he was confronted by an ornery game warden who didn’t like Newfies.The game warden ordered the Newfie to show his hunting license, and the Newfie pulled out a valid Ontario hunting license.The game warden looked at the. More

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