You couldn't be more wrong. Some of you think your wife is too plain, too skinny or too ugly for me. Wrong again. Those mousy little bitches that no o...e looks twice at in the supermarket really get me going.They're also a hell of a lot easier to get. Here's lesson number one. A lot of you guys wondered during your divorce why your wife gave you all of that bullshit about how she didn't feel beautiful anymore or how she felt old. This confused the shit out of you, didn't it? You told the bitch. Maybe Swedish? ‘What?’ ‘Water,’ he repeats, pointing out the lack of any aqua on the table. There are, however, ten pint glasses with varying degrees of empty. ‘Do you need some?’ I peek at his clothes, wondering if he’s a server. What kind of pick up line is ‘let me get you water?’ He’s wearing scuffed black boots, navy jeans and a cream and green striped sweater. The outfit doesn’t scream waiter, so I assume he is just a Good Samaritan who heard my drunken ramblings and decided I needed to. More

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