It is what pays the bills." That my be Jake, but it is not what I signed on for. I signed up for a life with my husband Jake and not a life where my f...ont door is a revolving door for my husband. You worked your job all these years and maybe made a trip twice a year and now it is every god damned week. And that isn't even the worst of it. Do you realize that on your last five trips you have told me when you would be back only to call me the day before I expected you home to tell me that you had. “Go fetch your bowl, buddy, good boy.” Buddy was back inside of five minutes with an actual dog-food bowl, a dish designed for dogs to eat and drink from. Buddy was a really good dog. He drank noisily and steadily for awhile.After asking Buddy to find the nuts, and having to listen to an obnoxious and over obvious slobbering slurping noise for a little while, Buddy quit clowning around and led them to the bulk food section where he could sample each dispenser and not even have to taste each one. More

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