The first one arrived exactly one week after our last meeting, and was short and to the point, as alwaysMiss Spencer,I hope you have been following my...instructions to the letter.I read it and then quickly deleted it, my pulse racing, suddenly hyperaware of the noises within our house, listening for footsteps, irrationally worried that my secret would somehow be discovered. That night my dreams were vivid. Thankfully, I woke early enough to take a quick shower and rinse the smell of unfulfilled. I knew I didn't want to do that. Yet as I thought about it I knew that I needed to do it in order to get past some of the hurts; to properly salve and heal my wounds. I paused to stretch and pulled the first horrid thing from my memory. I realized that my father could have killed me or at least permanently injured me on several occasions. How he had managed not to do so was a question I hadn't really examined. I would need to consider that. I might even ask James to help me set up a. More

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