“Hey mom!” “Hi, Honey,” I said, “what took so long?” “Got groceries on the way home. Give me a hand?” I gave Mad...ie’s bare midriff another little squeeze, and headed out to help the wife. Alice, my wife, is thirty-seven, but I swear she’s part elf. The santa-kind, not the Lord of the Rings kind. She’s 5’3, skinny, pert little ass and perky b-cup breasts. They went up to C’s while she was pregnant, but that just proved to me how much I love her itty-bitties. Natural. .. ) Uh, do you take American Express?”The rough looking characters in the pool hall all lost it. Everyone guffawed and verbally spelled out “L-M-F-A-O!! L-M-F-A-O!” They did not use the words they literally spelled out the letters. L-M-F-A-O does not really roll off the tongue, so it was obvious that these guys thought it was some new, cool thing to say, and did not know it was an abbreviation for Laughing My Fucking Ass Off.“Nobody takes American Express, DUMBASS!” The processing fees are ¾. More

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