I didn’t wear a condom-- I have them, but I just lost control. I’m really, really sorry. I’m a pig.” And I meant it. I’d just put a bund...e of my DNA right where it needs to be to make a little me and her. She hesitated, long enough that I thought she might be angry, then she chuckled and said, “It’s OK. I got you covered. You don’t have anything, do you?”“No. Absolutely not. I swear. I just had my annual physical, for work. They do all kinds of blood tests. Probably so the insurance. They are the worst kind of gigs in my opinion, because most of the audience are the overworked, overstressed kind of people who don’t care about comedy and don’t even try to laugh. Most of the time they’re a bunch of rich assholes, and I don’t know why they keep thinking it’s a good idea to bring in a comedian to try to lighten up their mood. The gigs pay massive bucks, more than what I make from ten normal gigs on the road. Even so, I normally turn them down. This one gig was on a cruise. More

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