"King Vortigen ruled England before Arthur's father, Uther," Merlin explains, "dangerous man to be involved with." Rubbish king." The Onlooker waves h...s tankard around, spilling something red coloured."Yep, rubbish king, good tyrant though." Yeah, good tyrant, if you like that kind of thing. He had my dad put to death for not being funny. Now that's a rule we need now, no more Jim Davidson DVDs, anyway, Merlin had me smuggled to a monastery when I was 7 or so. I left there a few centuries later. I dropped my towel and masturbated at the sight, quickly shooting my load. I hope the other film-watchers enjoyed that more. I really am an exhibitionist, and a voyeur. I went up the stairs to the window, paid my money and received a reassuring smile from the young guy there. No need for embarrassment, it said. We all know what you are here for. It was a pleasant feeling. Next stop was the locker room. As previously, mainly middle-aged business type men, dressing or undressing. The types one. More

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